Still With Us: A Song About Recovery, Faith, and the People We Carry
I wrote this song for Tristan, for my other friends and family lost to addiction, and for the people I love who are still in it. Their lives, their struggles, and the love I carry for them are the inspiration behind these words.
I wrote the lyrics in pieces while listening to different songs on YouTube Music, leaving those pieces as comments as the words came to me. Eventually, those thoughts about grief, determination, faith, and recovery came together. I used Google Gemini to create the song from the lyrics I had written.
“enough dead homies to make a family tree”
That line carries the weight of people I knew and loved. When I talk about addiction, I think about Tristan. I think about the other friends and family we have lost, and the people still trying to find their way through another day. I also speak from my own experience with addiction and recovery. These are lives connected to mine.
The experience I want people to hear about
I am also sharing this song to draw attention to the personal experience I described in A One-Time Intervention: A Personal Observation on DMT and Opioid Withdrawal . In that account, I described what I experienced as substantial relief from opioid withdrawal following a single intervention involving DMT.
That experience left me asking whether a one-time intervention could help people get through the withdrawals that make recovery so difficult. I want qualified researchers to take that question seriously and investigate it. My personal experience alone cannot establish safety, effectiveness for others, or a cure for opioid dependence. Withdrawal relief and lasting recovery both deserve careful attention.
Music gives me another way to bring people into that conversation. I want someone hearing this song to understand why I care so much about finding answers. I want the people still in addiction to hear that they are loved, that their lives matter, and that there are people who refuse to give up on them.
The faith beneath the song
My trust in Jesus Christ is the bedrock beneath all of this. It is what holds me steady when I remember Tristan and the other people we have lost. Through that faith, I remember that they are not lost to Him. I believe they are still with us.
I do not think of them as simply waiting somewhere for me, or for the rest of us. Their love is present in my life now. I carry them in the things I remember, in the words I write, and in my determination to keep going. Remembering them gives me another reason to live, to recover, and to reach for the people who are still struggling.
Only one to bow to king jesus/
Thick n thin always with us/
Those words are the foundation of this song. Even with everything addiction has taken, I still believe in love that outlasts it. I still believe there is a future worth fighting for.
I am sharing this song alongside my earlier reflection from February 2025 for anyone who wants to read more of my writing.
The lyrics, and where they began
Below are the pieces I wrote as comments while listening on YouTube Music, paired with the songs I was listening to. These are my original words; the links show where those pieces of the song began.
The song I was listening to — first passage
Only one to bow to king jesus/
Thick n thin always with us/
Now I'm found, never getting lost/
All my struggles left in the past/
Love for eternity to outlast/
The song I was listening to — second passage
When i say trust the process/
don't be looking counting your losses/
always move forward first off the start/
Gotta give it more than your opponent's heart/
Little bit of mind lot of elbow grease make art/
You know what's wrong, give what's right all your heart/
Look and nothing but eyes on the prize/
Make sure you can keep up before you ask to ride/
If it's about rights catch me in the fight everytime
The song I was listening to — third passage
0:28 new, old, fresh, rot or hot keep it all real/
Fighting alpha take all the food, eat your meal/
Harder than steel cold rolled/
Everyday write a story make the mold/
Never wait for destiny to take hold, I'm writing my story
The song I was listening to — fourth passage
Pitter patter rainfall on the rooftop,
splitter splatter blood on the sidewalk,
roll of chemical foil kill more will no recoil,
enough dead homies to make a family tree,
look around one day have to ask God when did my heart leave,
leaf of aluminum give the relief,
nothing can outpace recovery once you get a taste.
Listen to the song. Read the experience behind it. Share it with someone who needs to know they are loved, or with someone willing to take the research question seriously. I want these words to reach the people who need them.
For Tristan, and for every friend and family member we carry with us. Through my faith in Jesus Christ, I remember: you are not lost. You are still with us.
And for everyone still fighting addiction: your story is still being written.
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